What the hell is that mess?
It's the contents of my stomach.
What? Why have you been eating chocolate mousse containers?
I haven't. I've been eating Alpro soya chocolate desserts.
My suspicion detector is operating on overload. Are Alpro paying you to write this?
I wish they were. If they want to send me a crate of these, I'd be very grateful, as I currently spend around £3.30 a day on them.
What's so good about them?
Well, firstly, they're delicious. Secondly, they're vegan, which is good as I am too.
Oh for heaven's sake. "I luv teh ickle aminals, tehy are my fwends."
It's not just the animals, it's also the environment. From the back of the packet: "Soya protein products use five times less land and ten times less water and generate less CO2 emissions than products made from animal protein."
Yeah? I still haven't heard a good reason why I should buy these desserts.
Because they taste like heaven.
How would you know? You're an atheist.
Yeah. An atheist who knows delicious chocolate when she tastes it.
£1.65 per pack from Sainsbury's