Four years ago, the BBC asked me to come up with a series of tricky questions for a comedy show. I think they'll have used them by now, so here they are, along with my answers now I'm older and wiser...
What would Sarah Vine say? Also, I'm not sure I'd want to learn the truth about everything in the world. I think it would freak me out.
Hmm... if they were my ideal partner, I think I'd have to tell them.
Hell no! Some things are more important than money. Like happiness.
I don't think circuses really have freak shows any more.
I added 'the tattoo will be very expensive and painful to remove'. But no: I'd meet someone I fancied more who would hopefully be understanding about my huge ink-based error of judgement.
(By the way, it's surprisingly hard to come up with tricky questions!)